August 19, 1995
Okay, so my introduction is that I'm Jen and I've been married for 12 years to a wonderful man. We have an 8 year old son and a 6 year old daughter. Our family blog is The Things We Say.
I'm excited to see what new things I can learn from this book to enhance my marriage (always interested in doing that) and to be an encouragement to other women. Thanks Jan, for "facilitating" this discussion group.
I'm excited to see what new things I can learn from this book to enhance my marriage (always interested in doing that) and to be an encouragement to other women. Thanks Jan, for "facilitating" this discussion group.
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Intro & Part 1:
I really like that this book jumps right into what a wife's role is rather than dragging things out with definitions of what marriage is, starting with Genesis. Seems like a lot of books explain over and over again the basics of marriage but I appreciate this author's approach...her cut to the chase approach is great!
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I thought it was interesting to look up the meaning of "virtuous" and find that it means "held in high estimation" which is why it's often translated "excellent". I could only find it used three times in the scriptures concerning value of a woman...once being said of Ruth and once being said of the ideal Proverbs 31 woman. Then a third time as a Proverb in Prov. 12:4 "A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones."
I thought it was interesting to look up the meaning of "virtuous" and find that it means "held in high estimation" which is why it's often translated "excellent". I could only find it used three times in the scriptures concerning value of a woman...once being said of Ruth and once being said of the ideal Proverbs 31 woman. Then a third time as a Proverb in Prov. 12:4 "A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones."
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The question of "how I can be a help to my husband" is really huge for me. I've struggled with that for a long time because he is a pastor. Often "helping" him gets mixed in with serving the church but when my family and home come first this line can be blurry at times. He is often my greatest source of wisdom in this area....usually giving me guidance as to what should be the priority one day at a time.
The question of "how I can be a help to my husband" is really huge for me. I've struggled with that for a long time because he is a pastor. Often "helping" him gets mixed in with serving the church but when my family and home come first this line can be blurry at times. He is often my greatest source of wisdom in this area....usually giving me guidance as to what should be the priority one day at a time.
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Other than the basics of managing my home, caring for the children, providing meals for the family, helping with the finances, running errands, etc....I find that the biggest help is just that I'm home. He finds great comfort in knowing that despite what crazy things happen in his ministry struggles, I'm home holding down the fort, keeping things organized, caring for the kids, waiting for his return each day with my arms open wide ready to take him into the comfort of our home as a refuge from the world. He has come in the house before and hugged me and said, "thank you for just being here". That phrase kind of sums up everything I do as a helpmeet for him.
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Worldly women today and even some in the church have lost the value of being a helper to their husbands. I'm encouraged to not lose sight of that and to press on even though other marriages are falling by the wayside as casualties of our modern world's thinking about women and their roles. I wish every woman could read and understand even this first section of this book. It would change the whole world! I also liked the quote Jessica shared. It reminds me of the truth about submitting to our husbands and when we ask ourselves "how" Eph. 5:22 answers us saying you submit to your husband the same way you do to the Lord. (as unto the Lord).
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So, I'm trying to make myself a student of my husband which for me means that I'm constantly looking for ways to serve him more. I'd be interested to know if the other gals that attend the study came up with lots of ways to serve their husbands....I'm up for more ideas. =0)
5 comments:
Thanks for posting a photo!
One way that I would like to better serve my husband is buying/preparing more of the foods that he likes... even if it means Coca-Cola, Java Chip Ice Cream, ordering a pizza, etc. He does not mind the healthier recipes, but he is not ready to give up those old favorites!
I know that God is more pleased with my serving/honoring my husband than He is with my healthy food preparations.
I totally agree! That's a great way to serve our husbands....mine is the same as yours....so every once in awhile I have to make white flour pizza, dessert, fried chicken (the old fashioned way) and yes, I confess that I buy him soda even though the kids and I drink distilled water! LOL. =0) It's encouraging to know that there are other women out there that are like-minded, walking a similar path as I am. I'm very encouraged by you! =0)
What a great perspective you have about being your man's helpmeet. You seem to be balanced in your understanding of that blurred line between serving your husband and becoming intwined in his work of serving others. That has always been and will probably always be a difficult line to distinguish for pastor's wives. Even if it means drawing negative fire from folks in the church, be fiercely loyal to serving your husband and children first. You were created to serve him, not the church, first.
Looking forward to your intro and posts, flowersgirl! Nice to meet you! =0)
Jen,
What a joy to hear another pastor's wife's perspective on how to be a helpmeet. It is a great privilege to serve a man whose vocation it is to serve God, and yet the challenges and burdens that come with that are great as well. It can be an isolating place to be and we come to treasure the Great Counselor all the more. I look forward to hearing more from you about the practical ways to balance husband, home, ministry and your walk with God. I really loved your blog. It is very fun and down to earth - and I'm glad to know that you are not perfect :-). Could you please send me a family photo via my e-mail address (chelle.albania@gmail.com) so that I can see your face when I pray for you? Thank you.
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